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Have a Herpes Question?
Living with herpes can feel confusing sometimes. Whether you’re newly diagnosed or you’ve been managing it for years, there always seem to be new questions popping up:
- “Why did I test negative after testing positive years ago?”
- “Can I kiss my kids if I get cold sores?”
- “What products really help during an outbreak?”
- “How do I talk to a partner about herpes?”
If you’ve ever wished you could get clear, supportive, and trustworthy answers—without spending hours lost in Google rabbit holes—…
STD-Related Trauma: Why Counseling Isn’t Just for Cheating
When people hear about counseling and STDs, the first thought is often: “Oh, someone must have cheated.” But that’s not always the story.
Many people get herpes or another STD from a past relationship, or from a partner who didn’t even know they had it. No lies, no betrayal—yet the diagnosis can still feel like an emotional earthquake.
Why It Can Feel Traumatic
Getting told you have herpes (or any STD) can stir up a flood of feelings—fear, shame, guilt, even anger. You might wonder:
- “Wil…
Does Removing Pubic Hair Increase Your Risk of Herpes?
Why hair is nature’s protective barrier—and how to protect yourself if you choose to remove it.
When it comes to grooming, many of us don’t think twice about waxing, shaving, or trimming. But here’s something you might not know: removing hair can actually increase your chances of getting—or transmitting—herpes.
Why Hair Matters
Hair isn’t just there for looks. Pubic and body hair act like a natural barrier between your skin and pathogens, including bacteria and viruses like herpes simplex…
The First 30 Days: Herpes Diagnosis
So, you’ve just received a herpes diagnosis. Maybe it feels like the air has been knocked out of you. Maybe you’re calm… but confused. Maybe you’re somewhere in between. However you’re feeling—you’re not the only one who’s been there.
All of us in the Secret Society Support Group know what those first 30 days are like. We remember the shock, the tears, the shame, the Google rabbit holes, the moments of wondering: “What now?”
This is your survival guide. And better yet—you don’t have to survive…
How to Talk About Herpes with Your Friends
Telling friends about your herpes diagnosis can feel like standing at the edge of a high dive—terrifying at first, but often liberating once you take the leap. The truth is, herpes is far more common than most people realize, and chances are, someone in your social circle has it too. The key is approaching the conversation with honesty, simplicity, and the understanding that how you frame it shapes how they’ll receive it.
Why Talking About It Matters
When a Secret Society member, first told …
Afraid to Kiss My Loved Ones on the Cheek (Because I Get Cold Sores)
If you live with oral herpes (HSV-1), chances are you’ve hesitated at some point to kiss a loved one—especially during or after a cold sore. The fear of accidentally transmitting the virus can feel overwhelming and isolating, even in the most loving relationships. We would get questions from people who are afraid to kiss their nieces and nephews, children who are afraid to kiss their parents, and vice versa. There are cultures where kissing is part of every day's culture. People who kiss their b…
Swimming with Herpes: Is It Safe to Hit the Pool, Sea, or River?
Summer’s calling—sunshine, swimsuits, and that irresistible urge to jump into the water. But if you live with herpes, whether it’s HSV-1 or HSV-2, you might pause before diving in and wonder: Is it safe for me to swim in public pools, the ocean, or freshwater lakes if I have herpes?
Let’s clear up the confusion. Spoiler: yes, swimming is safe—but like anything, there are a few things worth knowing.
🌊 How Is Herpes Actually Transmitted?
Herpes simplex virus (HSV) is spread through direct ski…
How Stress Worsens Herpes Outbreaks (And What Helps)
Why Your Mental Health Directly Impacts Your Immune System
If you've noticed herpes outbreaks popping up during stressful times, you're not imagining things—science proves stress and anxiety directly trigger flare-ups. Research shows that chronic stress weakens immune function, making it easier for the herpes virus to reactivate. But here's the good news: managing your mental health can be just as important as taking care of your diet, stress levels, sleep and medication or supplements you're t…
What Is Herpes to Doctors?
The Medical Truth Behind the Stigma
How Healthcare Professionals Really View Herpes
If you’ve ever left a herpes diagnosis feeling ashamed or scared, here’s a reality check: To doctors, herpes is just a virus—not a moral judgment.
While society treats herpes like a scandalous secret, medical professionals see it for what it is: a common, manageable skin condition. So why does the public perception differ so much from the clinical one? Let’s break it down.
1. Herpes Is Medically Mundane
"H…
What You Can & Can’t Do with Herpes
Living With Herpes Doesn’t Mean Living in a Bubble
One of the biggest fears after a herpes diagnosis is the sudden belief that your life is now full of restrictions.
Can I kiss my kids?
Can I swim in a pool?
Do I need separate dishes?
The good news? Herpes doesn’t stop you from living a normal life. But there are a few things to be mindful of—especially during outbreaks. Let’s separate fact from fiction.
✅ Things You CAN Do With Herpes
1. Swim in Pools, Hot Tubs & the Ocean
Herpes is n…