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The Day I Got Diagnosed with Genital Herpes Was the Worst Day of My Life: Oh Sh*T Anniversary pt.5
It's Friday July 1st and this was the day that changed my everything. This was the day 14 years ago that I got diagnosed with genital herpes. I still have the dress that I was wearing when I was diagnosed with herpes so I thought I'd be fun to try it on.
If you can remember I had gone for my annual physical on Tuesday, so I was patiently awaiting my results. I was thinking that if I don't get a phone call by 3:00 then I'll have to call the doctors because otherwise it's a holiday weekend w…
What Life with Herpes Looks like for 14 Years - Oh Sh*T Anniversary Pt.5
In case you're just tuning in and haven't been following along this weeks series, let me bring you up to date. This is my "oh shit anniversary", aka the week I got diagnosed with genital herpes. So I'm bringing you along for the emotional ride and sharing what my diagnosis was like.
At this point in the week I still had not received my diagnosis and there was still so much up in the air. I remember feeling so unsettled and was in limbo wondering if I had herpes and if it was going to change…
Something Was Wrong but I Didn't Think It Was Herpes - Oh Sh*T Anniversary Pt.1
This week we're going to do something different.
14 years ago I was diagnosed with genital herpes.
I've shared things here and there but I've never walked you through exactly what I did and how I felt. Share what I can remember and the good, the bad and the ugly. My intention for this week is to bring awareness to herpes: your life moves on and you forget how big of a deal it is. Talk you through the exact week 14 years ago, build awareness and hand hold you through your diagnosis. Recon…
I Know My Partner is Still Afraid to Get Herpes
The Fear That Lingers – And How to Face It
Recently, a woman in our community shared something many couples experience: "My partner knows I have herpes. We’ve talked about it. He says he accepts it… but I can tell he’s still afraid of getting it."
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many loving, committed relationships hit this exact hurdle—even after disclosure, even after years together.
So how do you move past it?
First: Normalize the Ongoing Conversation
Why One Talk Isn’t Enou…
Herpes: God’s Punishment?
The Myth That Needs to Die
For centuries, sexually transmitted infections have been shrouded in shame, often tied to moral or religious judgments. One of the most persistent myths is that herpes—or any STI—is "God’s punishment" for immoral behavior. This belief isn’t just outdated; it’s harmful. It fuels stigma, isolates people, and ignores the biological reality of how common and manageable herpes actually is.
Let’s set the record straight: Herpes is not a punishment. It’s a virus—one th…
Take Time When Dating with Herpes: Build Connection Before Intimacy
Whether you or your partner has herpes, taking your time in a relationship is important for building trust and connection. It’s natural to want to get to know someone first before diving into the more complex parts of the relationship. There’s no rush—you can enjoy each other’s company and allow the relationship to develop at a pace that feels comfortable for both of you.
1. Take It Slow and Enjoy the Moment
If your partner has herpes and you’re unsure of how to move forward, that’s okay. Take…
Disclosing That You Have Herpes Before the First Date
Why It May Not Be the Best Idea
Deciding when to disclose that you have herpes is a deeply personal decision. For many, the instinct to be upfront about their diagnosis comes from a place of wanting to be honest and avoid potential future complications. But disclosing that you have herpes before the first date may not be the best strategy for a few reasons.
1. It Can Create an Unnecessary Barrier Early On
Disclosing your herpes status before even getting to know someone can place an unnec…
Afraid to Ask About a Partner's STD Results, But Willing to Sleep with Them?
Navigating the Challenges of Discussing Sexual Health
Entering a new sexual relationship can be exciting, but it also comes with responsibilities, including discussing sexual health. Many people find themselves willing to be intimate with a new partner but feel afraid to ask about their STD results. This fear is common, yet addressing it is crucial for your health and the health of your partner. In this blog post, we'll explore why it's important to have this conversation, how to approach…
Herpes and Relationships: Navigating Intimacy and Trust
Building Strong and Honest Relationships Despite a Herpes Diagnosis
Navigating relationships while living with herpes can be challenging, but it's entirely possible to build strong, loving, and honest connections. Communication, trust, and understanding are key components of maintaining healthy relationships despite a herpes diagnosis. In this post, we'll explore how to navigate intimacy and trust when living with herpes.
Open and honest communication is crucial in any relationship, especially…
Navigating Herpes Anniversaries: A Journey to Healing, Forgiveness, and Growth
This week, I had the privilege of welcoming new members from all around the world into our Secret Society community, and every time, I’m filled with gratitude for each and every one of you. It’s your unique stories, backgrounds, and shared experiences that make this community a sanctuary of healing for anyone who’s been impacted by herpes. A herpes diagnosis can feel isolating and bring insecurities to the surface. Often, people try to move forward, hiding these emotions, only to find that…