Blog
When Is the Right Time to Talk About Herpes (and Should You Get Tested Together?)
There’s a moment in every budding relationship when things start to feel exciting. You're vibing, texting, maybe sharing playlists and inside jokes, and you're starting to think… this could maybe go somewhere.
Then, boom — the question hits you:
“When do I tell them I have herpes?”
And, if you’re like a lot of us in the Life With Herpes community, that moment comes with about 300 sub-questions:
Is it too early? Too late? Should we just both get tested? What if they freak out? What if I ruin …
I Know My Partner is Still Afraid to Get Herpes
The Fear That Lingers – And How to Face It
Recently, a woman in our community shared something many couples experience: "My partner knows I have herpes. We’ve talked about it. He says he accepts it… but I can tell he’s still afraid of getting it."
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many loving, committed relationships hit this exact hurdle—even after disclosure, even after years together.
So how do you move past it?
First: Normalize the Ongoing Conversation
Why One Talk Isn’t Enou…
I Tested Negative for Herpes After 11 Years—What’s Going On?
When test results don’t match your history, here’s what you need to know
“I tested positive for herpes 11 years ago. But now… my results are negative?”
This Monday on our call support, someone shared their story: they had been living with their diagnosis for over a decade, managing it, accepting it, and learning to live fully despite it. But during a recent round of bloodwork, they were told they were negative for HSV.
So what’s going on here? Is it possible for herpes to “go away”? Was the…
The Origins of Herpes Stigma
How Fear & Misinformation Created a Lasting Shame
From Ancient Sores to 80s Moral Panic
Herpes has been with humanity for thousands of years, but the intense shame surrounding it? That's a modern invention. What began as a simple medical observation transformed into one of the most stigmatized conditions in modern history.
Let's uncover how herpes went from being just another skin condition to a cultural "scandal" - and why that stigma i…
Herpes: God’s Punishment?
The Myth That Needs to Die
For centuries, sexually transmitted infections have been shrouded in shame, often tied to moral or religious judgments. One of the most persistent myths is that herpes—or any STI—is "God’s punishment" for immoral behavior. This belief isn’t just outdated; it’s harmful. It fuels stigma, isolates people, and ignores the biological reality of how common and manageable herpes actually is.
Let’s set the record straight: Herpes is not a punishment. It’s a virus—one th…
Herpes and the Healing Power of Imagination: Envisioning a Positive Path Forward
When you first hear the words "You have herpes," it's like someone hit the pause button on your life. Suddenly, your mind may be flooded with fear, shame, anxiety, and endless "what ifs." It’s natural. Society has spent decades painting herpes in a negative light. But what if you could change the narrative? What if, instead of imagining the worst, you used that same imagination to envision healing, growth, and a future filled with confidence and wellness?
Welcome to a new way of t…
Are You Less Contagious with HSV-1 and HSV-2 if You’re Asymptomatic?
Understanding the Risk of Asymptomatic Herpes Transmission
If you’re living with herpes, you’ve likely wondered about the risk of spreading the virus, especially when you’re not experiencing an outbreak. Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV) types 1 and 2 are often thought of as highly contagious only during active symptoms, like sores and blisters. But how contagious are you if you’re asymptomatic? Understanding this can help you navigate intimacy, manage expectations, and communicate with partners about…
Dating with Herpes: The Anticipation, the Pressure, and the Freedom to Choose
As you all know, I love our Monday calls. On Monday mornings, when I’m busy making my son’s lunch, getting him ready for school, and getting him out the door, I’m also getting excited thinking about our calls. As always, seeing familiar faces is the best—and I love welcoming new people. If you’re thinking about joining and you’re scared or concerned about speaking up, please know that we are all here in the same boat. We’ve all been diagnosed with herpes. We’ve all been in your sho…
Take Time When Dating with Herpes: Build Connection Before Intimacy
Whether you or your partner has herpes, taking your time in a relationship is important for building trust and connection. It’s natural to want to get to know someone first before diving into the more complex parts of the relationship. There’s no rush—you can enjoy each other’s company and allow the relationship to develop at a pace that feels comfortable for both of you.
1. Take It Slow and Enjoy the Moment
If your partner has herpes and you’re unsure of how to move forward, that’s okay. Take…
Why You Shouldn’t Wait for a Herpes Cure
Many people with herpes often pin their hopes on a future cure that will erase the virus completely. While the desire for a permanent solution is understandable, waiting for a herpes cure may not be the best approach to managing the condition or living a fulfilling life. Here's why:
1. Herpes is Manageable Now
The reality is that herpes is already a highly manageable condition. With a healthy lifestyle, meditation and other relaxation methods, supplements (lysine, monolaurin, and and…