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Understanding Herpes: Insights from an OBGYN

Interview John Martin YT (Blog Banner)

Living with herpes can be challenging and overwhelming, but it's important to remember that you're not alone. In a recent interview, we had the opportunity to speak with Dr. John Martin, an experienced OBGYN, who shared valuable insights about herpes, its impact on pregnancy, and how individuals can navigate this diagnosis. Join us as we delve into the conversation and gain a better understanding of herpes from a medical professional's perspective.

Don't Blame, Educate:


Dr. Martin emphasize…

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The Secret Society: An Online Support Group for Herpes Community

Secret society - show 2022 (Blog Banner)

Finding out you have herpes can be a difficult and isolating experience. When Alexandra, the founder of The Secret Society was first diagnosed, she felt alone and without support. That's why she created The Secret Society, an online support group for people living with herpes.

The Secret Society is a place where people from all over the world come together to find support, make friends, and talk about their herpes journey. It's a safe space where people can be open and honest without fe…

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Accepting My Flaws and a Herpes Diagnosis - There Is More than Just Herpes

Accepting My Flaws and a Herpes Diagnosis (Blog Banner)

There are way bigger fish to fry in a relationship than having herpes. We always put the herpes issue as the worst possible thing that you could have and you'll never be accepted because you have herpes. Well I'm not saying its not a big conversation and I'm not saying that you'll always be accepted and won't get rejected but what I'm saying is that there are other big things too.

Someone asked me to talk about this as a blog topic. Saying that having herpes is just one of the things your p…

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Being Promiscuous Will Get You a Herpes Diagnosis

Promiscuity Will Get You Herpes (Blog Banner)

Well, yes and no. Yes, it's a numbers game and the more people you’re exposed to, the greater chance you have at contracting it. However, with over 80% of the population having herpes it makes it so common that even being monogamous, you can wind up with herpes. 

What we need to get away from is associating promiscuity with getting herpes and beginning to look at the fact that the majority of the population has it. I’ll get trolls on the internet tell me that I’m disgusting because I have h…

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Being Diagnosed with Herpes Later in Life (40s, 50s, 60s,...)

Being Diagnosed with Herpes Later in Life (Blog Banner)

Somebody once said something along these lines: Maybe that's easier when you're diagnosed at a younger age, but I'm over 40, it's so hard for me to accept this now.

It's easier to be diagnosed with herpes in your 20's. It's easier to get diagnosed with herpes in your 50's. These are all things I hear on a weekly basis. We always think the grass is greener on the other side.

I want to talk about this today because I've had a lot of people recently come to me and say that it would be way e…

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Afraid to Get Herpes: Here’s What to Do

Afraid to Get Herpes (Blog Banner)

Before getting herpes or a STD/STI I was terrified of getting one, especially herpes. I mean look at what the stigma says about people who have herpes. They are disgusting, they have slept around, they are whores that got this because they did something wrong and now they are paying for it and it can go on and on. Obviously I don’t beige this stigma and neither should you. 

In case you didn’t know I was actually a sexual educator back in high school. I went through training organized by Plann…

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Herpes Dating Stories: What You Really Need to Know when Disclosing

Herpes Dating Stories (Blog Banner)

Now that we have herpes one of the biggest fears is disclosing to a partner. I know this was my big fear and why I stayed the the guy I got herpes from for 2 years. I was so paralysed with fear of the rejection that I didn’t think anyone would ever want to date me because I was used goods. In fact this is the number one question I get from you all, whether it be in our weekly support groups or in DM’s or in the comments. The fear of disclosing just stops us. 

Let me just get to the point ther…

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HSV2 Is Contagious 10% of the Time

HSV2 Is Contagious 10% of the Time (Blog Banner)

Now that we have herpes we want to know what the chances are that we’re going to transmit herpes to our partner. I get asked this daily on my lives and in the comments. There is the preconceived thought that if you have herpes you’re contagious all the time and you’ll have outbreaks all the time and that your entire body is contagious. I can happily tell you that that is not true. 

Here’s how it works. 

Firstly, your entire body is not contagious. I’ve been asked by people who are newly diag…

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It’s Hard Not to Find Someone with Herpes

It’s Hard Not to Find Someone with Herpes (Blog Banner)

With herpes being so common it’s actually rare to find someone without it. I hear time and time again from people who are just diagnosed with herpes, or if they haven’t processed their herpes diagnosis, say that their partner should go find someone without herpes. Or when a rejection happens the person is thinking that it's going to be way easier to find someone else without herpes. 

Well, the truth is that the majority of the population has herpes. Here me out. 

Honestly it’s hard to get an…

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Dating after a Herpes Diagnosis

Dating after a Herpes Diagnosis (Blog Banner)

It’s totally possible and your dating life can be totally normal. In general we put so much on our plate to date. Things like: he has to be the one, or I’m so tired of dating immature people, are there any good ones left out there, ugh, here we go again and so on. We females put pressure on ourselves to find a good one and settle down, it’s what society expects from us. Regardless there is pressure from all angles to date and find someone. 

Then we also have the pressure of the casual sex. Th…

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