Accepting My Flaws and a Herpes Diagnosis - There Is More than Just Herpes
There are way bigger fish to fry in a relationship than having herpes. We always put the herpes issue as the worst possible thing that you could have and you'll never be accepted because you have herpes. Well I'm not saying its not a big conversation and I'm not saying that you'll always be accepted and won't get rejected but what I'm saying is that there are other big things too.
Someone asked me to talk about this as a blog topic. Saying that having herpes is just one of the things your partner will have to accept. And the other way around - you will have to accept things with him/her and it's a life long process. I love that someone wanted me to talk about this. I like to say having the herpes talk with your partner should be the easiest hardest conversation you have.
Just to give you a bit of a background on me, I've been with my husband since 2014 and we got married in 2017. So I've had to have some pretty big conversations with my husband. Some have been harder than others. Some are harder for him than they are for me and vice versa, some are harder for me than for him. The herpes conversation was a conversation that we had and it wasn't my proudest moment, but it was a conversation. I can come up with way bigger conversations that have been more difficult. Things like money, like raising our child and so on.
Just like what this person was saying is that we also have to accept things about our partner. Maybe he or she doesn't have to tell you about their herpes diagnosis, but there is something else that is heavy and dear to their heart. And we have to accept them for that as well.
What I'm saying is don't put this person on a pedestal thinking that they have never sinned and you are asking for forgiveness. Your partner will love you regardless of having herpes and you will love your partner regardless of what they have to disclose to you.
If you are getting ready to disclose to your boo then I want to make sure I let you know about the Tell Your Partner Toolkit. This has 16 videos that walk you through A-Z on how to disclose you have herpes. We talk about everything from why it's important to disclose to how to disclose if it's just a one night stand vs. a longer term thing, we talk about why rejection happens and a lot more. Anyway, you can download it here.