So, you’ve just received a herpes diagnosis. Maybe it feels like the air has been knocked out of you. Maybe you’re calm… but confused. Maybe you’re somewhere in between. However you’re feeling—you’re not the only one who’s been there.

All of us in the Secret Society Support Group know what those first 30 days are like. We remember the shock, the tears, the shame, the Google rabbit holes, the moments of wondering: “What now?”

This is your survival guide. And better yet—you don’t have to survive…

Telling friends about your herpes diagnosis can feel like standing at the edge of a high dive—terrifying at first, but often liberating once you take the leap. The truth is, herpes is far more common than most people realize, and chances are, someone in your social circle has it too. The key is approaching the conversation with honesty, simplicity, and the understanding that how you frame it shapes how they’ll receive it.

When a Secret Society member, first told …

If you live with oral herpes (HSV-1), chances are you’ve hesitated at some point to kiss a loved one—especially during or after a cold sore. The fear of accidentally transmitting the virus can feel overwhelming and isolating, even in the most loving relationships. We would get questions from people who are afraid to kiss their nieces and nephews, children who are afraid to kiss their parents, and vice versa. There are cultures where kissing is part of every day's culture. People who kiss their b…

If you’ve ever left a herpes diagnosis feeling ashamed or scared, here’s a reality check: To doctors, herpes is just a virus—not a moral judgment.

While society treats herpes like a scandalous secret, medical professionals see it for what it is: a common, manageable skin condition. So why does the public perception differ so much from the clinical one? Let’s break it down.

One of the biggest fears after a herpes diagnosis is the sudden belief that your life is now full of restrictions.

The good news? Herpes doesn’t stop you from living a normal life. But there are a few things to be mindful of—especially during outbreaks. Let’s separate fact from fiction.

Herpes is n…

We live in an era that celebrates sexual liberation—open relationships, casual dating, and body positivity are mainstream. Yet, despite all this progress, herpes stigma remains one of the last socially acceptable forms of shame.

Think about it:

Bu…

Everything feels so out of reach when you are first diagnosed. Everything comes crumbling down and you feel like you're never going to be able to come up for air. It's suffocating and terrifying at the same time. Would love to tell you after I was diagnosed I picked up and was able to straighten my life out right away. That wasn't the case and I did not have a rebound in one day or even the week later.

Back when I was diagnosed I was really struggling. So now it's the 4th of July. I had pla…

In case you missed it, we're in the middle of the Oh Shit Anniversary. It was 14 years ago I was diagnosed with herpes. 

Now it's Tuesday and I know something is wrong. This is the same day as it was eleven years ago. By now the blisters had fully shown up and I was in unbelievable pain. I felt so sick and could not imagine what was going on. Today was supposed to be just a regular physical but instead it turned into the day to go to the doctors and get a resolution.

I had totally mixed …

This week we're going to do something different.

14 years ago I was diagnosed with genital herpes.

I've shared things here and there but I've never walked you through exactly what I did and how I felt. Share what I can remember and the good, the bad and the ugly. My intention for this week is to bring awareness to herpes: your life moves on and you forget how big of a deal it is. Talk you through the exact week 14 years ago, build awareness and hand hold you through your diagnosis. Recon…

Real Stories, Real Support—No Judgment, Just Healing