What a Herpes Diagnosis Feels Like: Both Physically and Emotionally

what a herpes diagnosis feels like blog

There is nothing that prepares you for the phone call you get from your doctor, or the email or even the in visit check up when your doctor says, “you have herpes”. 

Most of us are shocked, deer in the headlights, frozen, and probably end up crying. 

I was there in 2011 when I was diagnosed with genital HSV2 herpes. Today is not the day for my story, you can watch that here but today is talk about what physically is going on and then the emotional trauma we go through. 


  • Flu-like symptoms
  • Fever
  • Body aches
  • Blisters
  • Swollen lymph nodes
  • Pain in your genitals
  • Itching and or burning sensation

It might be hard to sit down, jeans or tight sexy underwear are a definite no and sometimes it’s hard to urinate. All in all, it’s a pretty unbearable situation. 

The Eeyore phase:

This is what I call the deep dark place we go when we're diagnosed with herpes. As we know Eeyore, he’s always down and has a rain cloud that just follows him around. There is no light at the end of the tunnel and we don’t know how we’re going to get back on our feet. 

  • Anger
  • Depressed
  • Betrayed
  • Victimized
  • Violated
  • Embarrassed
  • hopeless

The physical pain goes away within a couple of weeks and often faster if we take the daily antiviral. But the Eeyore phase and the emotional pain is what lasts and what we have to work through to get back to our lives.

At the end of the day it feels like we’ve been hit by a huge wave. However, it is possible to get out of this physical and emotional pain. It takes work, it takes community and it takes learning about this virus. This is everything that you are doing by watching this video and seeking support. When I was diagnosed, there was no community. There was nothing but a trifold pamphlet that told me what herpes was. That’s why I created Life With Herpes and the Secret Society. It’s a monthly membership that houses people from all over the world who are dealing with a herpes diagnosis just like you and me. This is a key ingredient to healing from the pain. 

Check out our Community- Secret Society

Watch Youtube: What a herpes diagnosis feels like


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